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A CALL TO FEMINISM

In the past I had always been against feminism especially the way it was been described by a lot of feminists. They were bitter, hostile and irreligious. I did not want to be like them because I'm a sucker for love stories. I believe in fairy tales and I am blessed with a good man . I envisage a good marriage and could not understand why a lot of women were agitated and not happy. I reflected on the past and then it was easy for me to understand what feminists were often angry about and why feminism (without going to the extreme) is necessary going forward in our world today. I have had experiences with guys (call them my suitors) which should have opened my eyes to the reality of a lot of relationships. But I was too young to understand. My love for love often blinded me to the flaws of these guys who were around me at that time. And if I had made the mistake of marrying any of them, I would have been miserable and who knows, maybe I would have also been angry and bitter. Based...

The End SARS Protests

I have been quiet since the end sars movement started. Not because I didn’t want to speak but because I was hoping for it to culminate into something tangible and bring about the positive change that a lot of Nigerians desired. I remember having a conversation about it with someone and I prayed that it would not spiral out of control. I wanted a positive change but I wasn’t prepared for the cost of laying down lives because I sensed that it was going to get to that should the protesters expand their agitation to good governance. The powers that be would not surrender without a fight and they have the resources of the government on their side. They would claim that the protesters wanted to topple a “democratically elected” president. And that would make it illegal. And what is democratic about a president who has refused to listen to the cries of the people?In their short memory however, they have forgotten that this same president came into power for the first time in 1985 after a coup...

THE FIGHT AGAINST CORRUPTION IN THIS GOVERNMENT: REAL OR SELECTIVE

President Muhammadu Buhari's selling point coming into the 2015 general elections was his would-be fight against corruption which many Nigerians said was Nigeria's biggest problem and which the international community also said was Nigeria's bane of development. His reelection in 2019 also echoed the same thing although many Nigerians were of course saying they had seen his true colours. In this government's fight against corruption, so much has been witnessed. There have been several convictions of high profile politicians but only people not at the core of the government or those who do not share the same religion with the president. Many embarrassing cases have been swept under the carpet like those of the former secretary to the government of the federation, the reinclusion of a wanted former government official (who was answering for his crimes as ex pensions boss) in this government,  most recently the appointment of a former politician who was tried in court for...

RAPE, ITS JUSTIFICATION AND VICTIM SHAMING

It's sad that this is a world where things are not perfect but isn't that why we have laws; to correct the ills in society? I read today on a blog about a filmmaker who said that "nonviolent rape" should be legalized and that the reason rapists were raping girls was because they were sexually frustrated and that girls should accept it and even prepare themselves for it by carrying condoms and cooperating with their rapists. In fact it is clear that civilization is beyond running water and having flushable toilets, a lot of minds are still in a dark place. Before you join the number of people condemning him, think of how you shame victims of rape by suggesting that somehow they did something to provoke the animal instinct in the rapist. The dust hasn't settled yet on the case of Busola Dakolo and Biodun Fatoyinbo where an Abuja high court struck out the case and called an abuse of court processes and said it was statue barred. They were irregularities as cited by ...

BUSOLA DAKOLO vs BIODUN FATOYINBO

Honestly I am weak. I don't even know where to start from. Is it the the funny arguments I've heard from some blind people justifying rape or those seeking for ways to pick holes in her story? This country is backwards and this is just a reflection of society. That's why we have bigamy and  things like that still in this society. Please how do you not believe a married mother of three coming out to say she was raped about twenty years ago? Does that sound like someone who has something to gain by coming out with this story? Do you know the statistics of rape and abuse in this country? I guess not. Many women are even among those doubting her story when many of them have been abused at one point or the other. I even heard of a so-called British trained lawyer saying her argument would not hold in court, we shall see. I speak from experience. This is personal to me. I remember abuse as a young teenage girl riding in the bus when an old alhaji sitting beside me started touchi...

ON FATHERS' DAY

Fathers' day was celebrated quite recently and many people in different quarters were extolling the virtues of fathers. Some were even complaining that we do not celebrate fathers enough. I was in church on that Sunday and the pastor went on and on about obeying fathers so that one could get the 'father's' blessing from  them whether they are connected to God or not. This erroneous teaching has permeated Christendom and is making people feel guilty for standing their ground against their fathers even when such fathers are in the wrong. They quote the bible and say that the bible says that children should obey their parents because this is the first commandment with promise of long life attached to it. They forget the next verse which says parents, do not provoke your children to wrath. A father that is not connected to God can never give you any meaningful blessing. Even if he attempts it, only demons will come out of whatever he is trying to place on you. You can on...

FREE LEAH SHARIBU!

My heart bleeds as I write this. I'm literally weeping as I pen this down but I know that there is hope. The existence of God tells me so. It's been over a year since this girl was abducted alongside her school mates but while others were freed, Leah Sharibu remains in custody for refusing to denounce her faith and convert forcefully to Islam, the religion of the dreaded boko haram sect. What bothers me is the silence of the Muslim community and powerful leaders across the world on this matter. What I don't understand is why people cannot call a spade a spade. Why cannot they come out to speak out against mindless religious radicalism , oppression and persecution of Christians all over the world? What efforts have been made to free Leah Sharibu and others like her still in captivity? How long will this continue?  I think it's a decision world leaders need to make on the benefits of Islam to mankind. Honestly speaking,  world over the only people guilty of terroism are...

STATE OF EMERGENCY ON THE NIGERIAN VALUE SYSTEM!

We live in a country where we respect thieves and looters. The source of a man's wealth is not scrutinized. We worship and honour thieves especially if they are politicians. I need to speak to my Igbo people from the east, it is more common to find people in that part of the country worshipping fradulent people because of money, many times ill gotten wealth . But it is even spreading to other parts of the country now. Every Nigerian youth wants to be in entertainment. They do not value enterprise anymore. Nobody is willing to start small and grow to become big. Everybody wants quick money. But true and lasting success take time. First you plant the seed, then you water it and allow it to grow to maturity. Not only does this kind of success give you peace of mind, in the final analysis of everything, it's the only kind of success that guarantees wholeness and completeness. Evil may seem to triumph now but it's only for a short while . It's so bad today that it is ...

A SAD DAY FOR US ALL

After the recent presidential, senatorial and house of representatives election on saturday and with INEC( the Nigerian electoral body) announcing the results, It is clear in which direction the results are heading. It is sad that the only options Nigerians were made to choose from was between an unrepentant bigot and a man with a history of kleptomania. Nigeria boasts of the most educated immigrants worldwide, they are creative and industrious people. Why then should they be ruled by illiterates? What manner of elections were just conducted with Buhari winning in states where he is not even popular like Rivers and Nassarawa states? The problem with Nigeria is squarely a problem of leadership in prof. Chinua Achebes voice. The people left in Nigeria are the weak, illiterate and ignorant masses and these are the people who vote. What Nigeria needs is a re-orientation. A revolution. But how do you re-orientate over 100 million people who are poor, weak and not informed. Should the you...

FINDING THE RIGHT BALANCE BETWEEN RELIGION, TRADITION AND WESTERNIZATION

Someone once said "the church is becoming worldly and the world is becoming churchy". I agree. It's not uncommon to find people on secular blogs quoting scriptures when leaving comments and actors and actresses thanking God and attributing success to God even if they have just finished acting sex scenes. Musicians thank God for the success of their music videos after featuring naked girls. The list is endless . It is this same entertainers who go to any length to copy american entertainment and argue that it should also be applicable to their home country. Another person once told me that I could be a model at the same time be a Christian. I just laughed. They use the late Whitney Houston as an example of how she believed in God at the same time was an actress and a singer and how she was going to heaven after she died. Only God knows if they went to heaven and saw her there. People live in self-delusion. You cannot eat your cake and have it. It's either you are in t...

WHO FOLLOWED THE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE LAST NIGHT?

Happy new year friends and welcome to a blissful year. I hope the year has been beautiful for you thus far. It's an election year like we already know and the presidential debate just went down last night. My take: Isn't it appalling that the president of a country seeking re-election was absent from this debate for flimsy reasons not that I think that he would have had anything to say at the debate because his performance given the time he had was below par. Obviously he ran away because it is obvious that he wouldn't have been able to stand the brain power of the three candidates who participated in the debate. Maybe he thinks he is bigger than the country and that without lifting a finger, he could win at the next polls, he should think again. His habitual impasse when being spoken to or advised would play against him this time around. The country is starting to wake up. It is not business as usual. Following in his footsteps, his northern brother who many people think...

BETWEEN ATIKU AND BUHARI FOR 2019

Many Nigerians are desperately seeking good governance. For more than a decade the political parties the country has had have failed to deliver on the much needed dividends of democracy. As the 2019 election draws near, there seems to be a lot of debate surrounding who the better candidate is between the two aspirants of the two biggest political parties. Some people believe the Incumbent President Muhammadu Buhari deserves a second tenure for 'fighting corruption'. Others think he has failed woefully over all. Those in support of Atiku Abubakar believe he can steer the country away from the Nepotistic tendencies of the incumbent and give well deserved appointments. His critics say he is corrupt and is just looking for an opportunity to enrich himself and his cronies. Let us look at the profile of the two candidates: Does president Muhammad Buhari honestly believe that he deserves a second tenure with the way he's handled the economy, his lop-sided appointments and his ...

MOVIE REVIEW: THE HATE YOU GIVE

Bang! bang! Shots fired out. Loud cries......."Don't shoot"!, Heard from a young lady. Starr. Whose screams and painful eyes were a witness to her young friend Khali, shot by policemen while trying to take his hair brush, from a bag. Tears. Wails. Lies. Injustice. Early death. Confusion. A distorted teenage mind on where to lay, in the code of law. The hate you give...... Starring 1. Sanaa Lathan 2. Anthony Makcie 3. Common 4. Issa Rae Tells a tale of true outright cold-blooded killing of black people who are doing no wrong other than...... Be a different skin color. It's a heart rendering film where the real heart of some white men is exposed and there in exposing to light, what we as individuals go through in Life.  For example, a light or dark skinned  young and unmarried woman, being a Target of hate, by another woman who happens to be married with kids. Causing emotional and mental stress to the unmarried woman who really has done no wrong. A student in t...

ASUU STRIKE: REMEMBERING THE ADMINISTRATION OF UMARU MUSA YAR’ADUA

The Academic Staff Union of Universities, ASUU has been on a strike since the last few weeks over the non implementation of the 2009 agreement reached with the federal government. The federal government has constantly maintained that the agreement reached in 2009 is not implementable. If an agreement that was reached over nine years ago cannot be implemented in 2018, it then literally means that we were better as a country in 2009, it also shows that Yar’adua was indeed the hero of modern development in Nigeria. The present administration is enjoying a sweet sale of the oil in Niger Delta today because Yar’adua brought peace to that region; he created the Ministry of Niger Delta Affairs which the present administration has completely neglected. The 2009 agreement between the Federal Government and ASUU is implementable if the government sees the importance of education to the development of a nation. The kind of money that is given to INEC to conduct an election that ...

GETTING MARRIED AND BEING SUCCESSFUL AFTER 30

Many people see the big 3.0 as a landmark age. To them at 30 you should have accomplished all your goals, gotten married and had a few kids. This view although popular is sometimes unhealthy , because real success and achievements take time. Not everyone who is unmarried at 30 will marry late or unaccomplished at 30 is a failure. For short term goals and minimal achievements, 30 is fine. I even read about someone bragging on how she had a masters degree and was married with two kids at 30. The question no one asked her was 'what had she done with the masters degree and how her children were faring academically? ' It's not enough to get married and have kids before 30 or even finish a masters degree? Is she fulfilled as a person? Had she discovered purpose and was she on her way to fulfilling it? You see we all want to brag when it seems as if we better than the next person. Alas! Many of us are ignorant. Many Nigerian billionaires became billionaires only after 30, many ...

RAPE AND THE CORRESPONDING JUSTICE FOR VICTIMS

What do we say to this malaise that has bedeviled society amongst other vices? The recent brutal murder of 13year old ochanja who was sodomised and heavily abused by both uncle and cousin shows that a lot still needs to be done in fighting against these kinds of crime in society. The follow-up for justice for this innocent young life cut short by mentally derailed (in my own words) trusted relatives is equally disheartening . I read somewhere that the uncle was even pleading to be released because of his status in society and that they should 'settle the matter amicably'. What effrontery! One can only imagine the kind of pain this girl was subjected to for the length of time this lasted and what was going through the mind of her attackers. And this uncle is supposedly a lecturer. Heard the son is at large now. The Nigerian police and the office of the public defender of the state, the human rights commission and all other relevant authorities should see to it that justice is...

THE UPCOMING GENERAL ELECTIONS (NIGERIA)

The upcoming general elections in Nigeria will be very interesting A whole lot of people both in Nigeria and across the world will be watching to see how the elections would be conducted and thereafter the outcome. Of special interest would be the outcome of the presidential election which is expected (all things being equal ) to produce the next president of Nigeria or to carry on to completion the second tenure of the incumbent who is president Muhammadu Buhari. Different people have different opinions on the performance of the first term of the current president. It is a tenure which has witnessed so much crisis and violence in different parts of the country ranging from the fulani herdsmen killings in the north central states and in some parts of the south, the armed banditry in zamfara, the ethno-religous crisis in kano and kaduna and so much more. Add the recession which was one of the worst in the history of the country and the seeming selective fight on corruption and you have...

WHEN ELIGIBLE BACHELORS MARRY USED GIRLS

I saw recently a post on one of my favourite blogs, an honest question by a group of concerned and perplexed good girls asking why eligible bachelors are getting married to bad girls or retired "runs" girls. The question was addressed to a popular relationship blogger and he attempted to supply the answer but in my own opinion did not do a good job of doing so. So here is my own attempt and advice to these girls: World over, strange things are happening, didn't begin now but has recently become more frequent. There is a total loss of values and what was once being frowned upon is now generally accepted. The world seems to have shifted from its center and its now totally upside down and the good old values we were brought up with is now being rejected and discarded and what is accepted today are things that were before termed abominable. In simple terms, good is now bad and bad is now good. Don't fret however, this group of eligible bachelors marrying these women are...

LOVE IS OVERRATED

We often mistake lust for love and many people mistake infatuation for true love. So many people preach that if you are no longer happy in a marriage then you should just call it quits. How about telling people to remember what made them happy in the first place and work on getting back to that place. A man wakes up in the morning and tells his wife he wants a divorce because he has fallen in love with someone else even when children are involved. The fact that you once proposed marriage to a person means you once considered her above every woman, how then do you discover years into the marriage that you love another? Especially after having kids. You probably have seen a slimmer woman or a pretty face or a sexy woman and concluded that you now have a new love. The desire for something new is not usually love but an attraction which can be classified as lust or infatuation. Any time you put your new flame above your children, then you know that you are deep in lust. Sex is an integra...